So here is the “book” definition: Emotions and feelings actually describe two different processes that philosopher William James highlighted – bodily driven ones (emotions) and thinky-driven ones (feelings). Emotions are your subconscious reactions to physical experience – the information from your environment that comes in through your senses (sight, taste, touch).
Emotions are your brain’s split second responses to a situation, and they kick off changes in your body.
Feelings are your conscious reactions expressed in thoughts. They are your mind’s conscious interpretation of the environmental input affecting your body – in other words, feelings are mental experiences of bodily states.
Memory, beliefs and associations play an essential role in feelings, bringing meaning to whatever you’re experiencing.
Understanding the difference helps us take advantage of how the body and mind work together to shape who we are – which is the sum total of how we behave.
Here’s how I interpret….when someone says or does something that affects us, say in a negative way, our brain sends that signal to our body and we feel emotions. However, our “feelings” are a reaction to what we think.
Are you understanding the difference or still confused? I feel it is important to know the difference because so many misunderstandings and quarrels and outright fighting can occur from someone simply saying, “You hurt my feelings”….but in reality, those feelings came from an emotion that may not be accurate.
I prefer to keep my life “light” and refrain from drama or misunderstood circumstances by not “reacting” to what you say or do that may not be to my liking. I would rather step back, count to 5, breathe and then “respond” to you. Makes sense to me….I hope it does to you too. It just makes life so much easier.
Happy 2016 – trust you had a great Holiday Season and that all is well. Our annual visit with family to California was awesome, creating new memories, long trip, short stay – but certainly all worthwhile.
So within the last few weeks, I have met with individuals creating their New Year – this was done via a Ladies Vision Board Workshop I hosted earlier this month – it was such a success, I am doing it again in February. In our discussions, it was revealed to me how unhappy most women are. They put their goals and dreams on hold to take care of others; and frankly, in my generation, that was the message early on. However, as time has passed you start to see some rewards, and yet a lot of setbacks with this type of thinking.
We have fallen somehow into codependency mode whether it be with family, a relationship, co-workers, friends. Now it’s not to say we shouldn’t be there for others, but damn….some take it to an entirely new level. Let’s take, for instance, some women/men with their young adult children, they become so enmeshed in their lives and lose sight of themselves. Our greatest gift to children is roots and wings – let them fly.
But back to your dreams and goals….because of that enmeshment you have overlooked what makes YOU happy. You put your goals on hold and they have been there and will remain indefinitely. Then the kids go to college, start their careers or businesses and now YOU don’t know what to do with yourself. Hence, the Vision/Dream Board…try it!
At the Workshop the women experienced laughter, tears of joy and hope for their future. It’s not just about cutting/pasting images on a Board – it was the whole experience shared with other women, saying out loud what YOU want in life – I cannot wait until our next Workshop. It’s exhilerating to see women come to life.
So on my Vision Board I had an image of a historical home in Bedford Hills. This home has an attic/loft which was what I had dreamed of having to meet with Clients in that area. As much as I enjoy meeting at Panera Bread and Starbucks, this particular location kept pulling my attention to open an office here. I will, though, continue to coach via Skype for national Clients.
After praying on this and sharing it with the Universe and others, it has become a reality. Now I had been thinking about this since Nov 2015 and here we are in January 2016 and I am moving in February. The Vision Board works….you look at it every single day in an area of your home or office and it is a constant reminder of what you want in YOUR life. Hokey you might think? I think not….from my experience, I have seen many dreams comes to life.
The aromatherapy and spiritual jewelry line (www.gloriafavreau.com/successories) was a dream I had for many years….Voila, it’s here. Click on Blog: “It’s Starting To Make Scents”….that, too, was on my Vision/Dream Board.
So when you are ready to start putting YOU first and creating or working towards what YOU want in life, changes you may want in life….start with a Vision Board or take pics and upload to your smart phone and look at those images every single day. With life keeping us as busy as it does, the distractions and challenges, it is very easy to forget or overlook YOU.
And many times, you just need that push, that individual that will hold you accountable ~ if you are ready to be a new YOU, (sometimes just a lil’ tweak)… I’m here. Life coaching is a partnership, focusing on your goals and your results. Let’s do this. Start LIVING your DREAMS ~ be happy!
As a little girl, I remember my Mom drilling this message into my sister and I. She owned a bar/restaurant in The Bronx. On a daily basis, there were new faces coming into her establishment … some were friendly, some were not. The message of “stranger danger” was received at an early age, but I don’t think they called it that back in those days.
Recently I accompanied my husband on a business trip to Wildwood, NJ. While he was exhibiting at his trade show, I was on the beach. I was not alone ~ I had my book, my laptop, my iPad and my iPhone. 😉 Not far from me was another woman, alone with her tech toys as well. I never saw this woman before and was compelled to strike up a conversation. “Look at those ocean waves this morning.” She immediately smiled and we started a discussion about how hot the day was, how nice it was to be in Wildwood with the summer crowds behind us, how beautiful the sky was, etc., etc. That was the introduction to becoming familiar with each other.
She shared about where her life was right now ~ she was wealthy but alone. No one to share her riches … an ugly divorce now behind her, with children who abandoned her after a long history of alcoholism, she was very lonely. She got sober 6 months ago and is still repairing the damage done. When I shared I was in recovery myself, she light up like a Christmas tree.
What were the chances of 2 women, never having met before, have so much in common. I explained how making amends in sobriety is a process. The steps in Alcoholics Anonymous are in their order for a reason. Her biggest stumbling block right now is patience ~ you don’t get sober and then all is forgiven from the past. You first need to learn about yourself, why you drank the way you did, and how you got to where you are today and hope for the future. I made sure to let her know how much talking with her helped me ~ it allowed me to reflect on how far I have come in my own journey.
I spoke to a stranger today ~ and what a gift! She reminded me of early recovery and the trials/tribulations I faced, overcame and living a life today that is beyond my wildest dreams. I shared with her how my faith in a Higher Power has become the root of all. We laughed, we hugged and she thanked me for helping her have a brighter outlook on her day. TODAY is a gift, this is why we call it the PRESENT.
Enjoy life ~ talk to a stranger and put a smile on their face. You have no idea what that individual is currently experiencing. A brand new face, a new smile, a new outlook is all someone needs. And when a stranger approaches you, don’t be so quick to push them away ~ be the light! We need an abundance of peace, love and understanding in this world.
And after our talk, ah-h … I was filled with gratitude and returned to watching the beautiful ocean waves coming up on the beach and thinking to myself, “You’ve come a long way, baby.” Peace, Light! Mucho hugs!
When most people hear the word “addiction,” they automatically think alcohol or substance abuse. According to Dictionary.com, here’s their definition of the word:
noun: the state of being enslaved to a habit or practice or to something that is psychologically or physically habit-forming, as narcotics, to such an extent that its cessation causes severe trauma.
Be “present” when in the company of others, especially our loved ones.